had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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