I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
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