It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
