Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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