Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
