Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Randomize
