I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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