the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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