It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Randomize
