Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
