Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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