that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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