i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize