You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
