I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Watching her eat just hurts me
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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