What a fucking waste of an outfit
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
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