i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
