Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
