I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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