break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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