No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Randomize
