I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
