Me too!
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Randomize
