i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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