if you like me you must not know who I am
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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