marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize
