yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
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