Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Randomize
