shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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