just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I think I died a long time ago.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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