Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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