okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize