they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
