Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
