im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
And then he peed in my hair
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