Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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