i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize
