If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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