My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize
