one word: firstdatebathroomanal
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
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