I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Randomize
