yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
