my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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