but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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