fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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