i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
