I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
