We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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