i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
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It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
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I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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