I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize