Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
