wanna go halves on a baby?
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize